How Do You Forgive The Unforgivable?

How do you forgive the unforgivable?

I don't know.

How do you forgive a person that betrayed your trust, abused you, hurt you emotionally, mentally, physically?

I don't know.

I have never suffered like some have. I never suffered from child abuse. (Spankings yes, beatings never. There IS a huge difference.)

I'm thinking again about Dolores Aguilar and the obituary her daughter wrote. I talked about it in my last post.

"There will be no service, no prayers and no closure for the family she spent a lifetime tearing apart..."

I'm incredibly sad for this family. Emotional, mental, physical abuse of the children and no one apparently knew, no one stepped in, no one called CPS. Although no one has said it, I strongly suspect that her husband also suffered from domestic violence. (Yes, men are abused by women too, domestic violence is a two way street.)

This should not have happened. And yet stories like this abound. Child abuse, domestic violence goes on behind closed doors every single day. We don't know what's in another person's heart, we only know them by their fruits.

My first reaction to the obituary was horror. My second was asking why this daughter would air the family's "dirty laundry" to the world.

However, upon reflection, I realized that sometimes it's good to air your laundry.

Perhaps this is the start of a new life, not just for this family, but for families suffering from the same issues, right now, today. Perhaps this is the end of a generational curse.

The dialogue that Dolores' obituary has started isn't going to end in a day or a week.

My friends, there are children out there who need our help. There are families that need our help.

As Christians, we CANNOT turn away. We are mandated to follow authority. And if the person abuses their authority, we are mandated to take it to a higher level. Not "just" laying it at the Throne.

No, we are mandated to step up and report domestic violence, report child abuse, report the bruises on that child, report that argument that's going on next door, wife screaming and children crying out. We are mandated to report it to earthly authorities as well as taking it to the Throne.

These are our brothers and sisters, we NEED to step up.

For you see, when a parent abuses their authority by abusing their children, a man (or woman) abuses the spouse/partner/significant other, he/she has stepped outside of the Will of God. Once a person has stepped outside of God's Authority (and abuse is most certainly that!) we must, as members of the Body, step up and say "STOP".

We, as the Body, need to let people know that staying in an abusive relationship is NOT the Will of God. Oh heck no!!

And staying in a relationship where the other parent abuses the children, OH HECK NO!!

All of our brothers and sisters are collectively ALL our responsibility. If our brother or sister in Christ steps outside the Will of God, it's our Duty to step up and do the right thing. Yes, that means calling the cops or CPS AND informing the Pastor and Elders AND praying for the victim AND praying for the abuser.

And if the abuser is the Pastor him/herself?

Do I really, really have to say it? If the Pastor has stepped outside the Will of God, then the Pastor needs to step down. Bottom line, that's it. If you can't shepherd yourself, you surely can't Shepherd the Body.

And the victims?

How do the victims of abuse forgive?

I don't know.

But God knows and that's what we lay at the Throne, prayers for Healing, prayers for Happiness, prayers for Forgiveness.

I have no answers on how to forgive the unforgivable.

I know the earthly side. Turn the abuser in, testify in court, let the earthly authorities punish him/her, get counseling and therapy.

But how do you forgive the unforgivable?

How do you forgive the abuser, the murderer, the evil that men and women do to the people they claim to love?

How can you heal the mind, soul, spirit of the victims?

I can only say that we are all Forgiven, that Jesus forgave us all in that moment,

"Father, forgive them, they know not what they do."

He has Forgiven me. He can Forgive you.

But how do you forgive the unforgivable?

"There will be no service, no prayers and no closure for the family she spent a lifetime tearing apart..."

Maybe you can't do it alone. I don't think I could.

But God can do it. All you have to do is ask Him. All you have to do is lay it at the Throne.

God will handle it all.

Even if there is no justice on this earth, there is still the Judgment at the Throne. I take comfort in knowing that there is still a final Authority on all things.

Even though Dolores passed from this earth unpunished for the abuse she laid on her family, she still has to face the final Judgement.

She will not be alone.